My 2025 Ta-Da List

(It’s a bit different than last year)

Friends,

We’ve nearly made it to the end of the year. How we all doin?

I’m being pulled to reflect and restart today, on the winter solstice. I’ll start by sharing a blessing from last year’s post, because it’s lovely and much needed:

May you find peace in the promise of the Solstice night,
That each day forward is blessed with more light.
That the cycle of nature, unbroken and true,
Brings faith to your soul and well-being to you.

As I look back, I’m feeling gray, to be honest. There was one magnificent burst of color this summer, but after that I seem to have slowly petered out. Completely understandable, as life’s been a lot lately — from developing severe anemia, to financial strain, to losing our wonderful pup, George. While I’m finding moments of holiday cheer, I have a weary feeling inside. “Bit of a wobble,” as my UK friends say.

RIP, beach baby <3

Still, I’m taking a stab at a Ta-Da list again this year, if only for posterity’s sake:

1. Dave and I started couple’s therapy.
This has been such a meaningful investment in our relationship. We’ve unearthed trauma from our individual histories and learned how it impacts us as a couple. We’ve examined our pattern together (I get riled up, he shuts down). I realized I’ve been subconsciously recreating the toxicity I experienced in my marriage — I believe requests will be met with conflict (not the case whatsoever) and go into fight-or-flight to get ahead of it. A malfunctioning nervous system (aka dysautonomia) isn’t doing me any favors, either. Per our therapist’s recommendation, I’ve decided to try being vulnerable and expressing my needs directly. What a concept! Still a work in progress, but it’s been transformative so far.

2. I completed a NYSS virtual painting marathon in June (wrote about it here).
This was easily the peak of my year. 10 days, 6-8 hours of creating per day!** It shifted my creative outlook from “I must make something good” to just “make, make, make.” I felt free, inspired, childlike, flowing, and happy. (I’ve been putting my energy into making money these past few months, but need to get back to making art, stat.) Dave helped with so much to make it happen, and I realized just how much energy it takes simply to exist on a day-to-day basis. When all that was taken away, I bloomed.

**Folks with ME / PEM — I see you, and if you have the ability, please be mindful with big energy expenditures like this. In a perfect world, I would have built up my capacity first, but I got financial aid, got super excited, and decided not to pass it up. On July 1st, Dave took me to the ER for chest pain. Lesson learned!

3. Wow, Dave moved in August 1st!
This was another massive shift, and not without its triggers. My past two cohabitating experiences didn’t go so well, and it’s Dave’s first time living with a significant other. I’m impressed with how honestly we navigated the transition, and grateful for the cozy feeling of home we’ve created and earned together.

4. I made my first face-to-camera appearance(s) on Instagram (here and here).
I’m so proud of myself for showing up exactly as I am — I’d go so far as to say that’s some of the most important work of my recovery. It takes an unbelievable amount of energy to mask up and hide ourselves away. On the topic — I really, really resonated with this post from But You Don’t Look Autistic.

5. I started driving longer distances, and taking on freelance work again.
Either my mental capacity has grown, or I’ve got energy to spare with my daily steps at around 2,200 (down from 4,000). I’m planning to recalibrate and safely address my physical capacity once I resolve my iron issues.

6. I published 12 Substack posts and got my first paid subscriber!
I think I’m officially… a writer?! And it means so much that a stranger would pay to read my words, supporting me and my work on here. From my heart to yours, thank you. <3

7. Dave and I leaned into community.
As I started getting out more, I was able to strengthen multiple friendships, and we met two new beautiful babies! We also managed to see my nephew, PJ at least once a month (except for one month when he had a cold).

Auntie life — I freaking love this kid.

8. I got my first dental cleaning in years.
It was terrifying, yet cathartic — kind of like chopping off all your hair. I’d actually done a decent job keeping up with flossing (anyone with health challenges knows how tough this can be). Two words: bathroom. chair.

9. I took my first flight since 2023!
Dave and I visited Chicago for the first time :-) and I’m most proud of myself for using wheelchair assistance. We had great experiences in both airports and at the Art Institute, which allowed me to 1- survive the trip and 2- enjoy as much time as possible. It was pretty scary how much better I felt — most everyday spaces aren’t accessible like that, and it made me miss the ease of existing as my former self.

Seeing Monet in person is certainly a milestone.

I’m grateful for the reflection that writing gives me, the nuance. At first, I found myself comparing to more uplifting health progress last year, and feeling shame that I had stagnated. (Like, by what definition?! It’s literally not even true. And definitely not something to feel responsible for, might I add.) But what I’ve realized is simple — lots has happened, and I’ve done my best.

I’ve decided that my word for 2026 is “Authenticity.” I’d like to renew my sense of self by devoting more time to whatever lights me up and feels sustainable for this body. That’s how I create an environment conducive to healing. If you were to pick a word (or already have!), what would it be?

August 2025.

Sending love to all and wishing you moments of genuine peace and joy.

Thank you, as always, for being here,
Lisa